Tiger Woods Apology Video

In which Eldrick revealed that he apologizes in the same way that he plays golf in the same way that he has sex: fast asleep. For a world-famous celebrity, he is astonishingly uninteresting. He obviously bored the pants off all those women. He doesn't even begin addressing his problems until 7 1/2 minutes into his video. This morning, the "Tiger Interview" was on every single channel: ESPN, CNN, ABC, etc. TIGER, GET OFF MY TV WHEN I'M TRYING TO CATCH UP ON MY NCAA BRACKET! I would just love it if Tiger's statement had been written by Charles Barkley rather than Ari Fleischer. After being pulled over, Charles explained his DUI to a police officer by saying, "You want the truth? I was gonna drive around the corner and get a blow job." Imagine that same exact statement being read in Tiger's monotone voice -- it would be hilarious! In the meantime, I wish golf would just go away. Fellow golfers aren't willing to comment on the Tiger fiasco, and public hecklers are being warned to stay a... Read more

Ah hade a dream..that ah was locked in a telephone booth(?)...an' 'Feelin's' ' was comin' in an' ah couldn't escape...and I still can't get out of that phone booth...when the late Henry Ford II was confronted with bangin' chicks on the side,his answer was :"Never complain,never explain."This tradition goes back to Jack Dempsey's comments to his wife when he lost his heavyweight title to Gene Tunney.The great Dempsey said:(*)"I forgot to 'd'uck."

Seems like you can apologize for an incident, but not a lifestyle. Tiger, get yourself single already. It seems to suit you better.

Automatt nails the essence of this in his review. It was first degree damage control right out of the Spin Doctor 101 handbook. Uncomfortable? Not at all. Boring. Absolutely.

An interview of sorts, answering all the questions that have been flying around since T-Day (no, not Thanksgiving Day... the day the sports media had their next six months of stories laid out before them is now known as Tiger Day, a new media holiday to celebrate their joyous occasion). While scripted, the apologies were thorough and every point was hit. Tiger seemed genuine for the most part, and it was nice seeing some anger when he directed his comments toward those that tracked and followed his wife, mother, and children after the uncovering of the affairs. He was right that his words don't mean much, as it is his future behavior that will prove his reform.

What's impressive is that a story so sensational and sleazy could culminate in 14 minutes of the most boring video in the history of spin doctoring. Clearly his plan is to be so detached and dull for the next year that we just give up on the story. I'm pretty sure he'll be able to out wait us all. He's been practicing being a dull media figure for about a decade.

About a week ago, I read the headline of a tabloid magazine, and the headline was: "Tiger Cheats in Rehab." I swear it had me laughing forever. Anyway, I wonder what he was actually doing behind that podium ('Police Academy,' anyone?)

He spent most of the conference saying what we all know. In my opinion, there is no way to fix that marriage, once you cheat and you are forgiven you will do it again. That marriage was hurt before the scandal came up. I can't find any other reason why he would repeatedly cheat on his wife. You can have an affair in a weak moment, but how many affairs did he have?? I don't see any reason why he is not doing it again. I feel sad for all of them, but mostly for the kids and the wife.

This apology had 0% to do with his wife and family, and 100% to do with his sponsorships ie "public opinion." This is big business. In addition to sports endorsements that revolve around endorsing a consumer product like a shoe or a car, Tiger's sponsorships have him endorsing brands that sell to other businesses, like Accenture -- a $20 million dollar deal. His other endorsements include Nike for $30 million, Gillette for $15 million, and Electronic Arts for $8 million. All in all he makes more than $100 million per year in endorsements. That's a serious business for all of Team Tiger -- they can't risk losing that just because he likes to sleep around and the public found out (his wife likely knew for quite a while). So, he apologizes and goes to sex rehab. I'd bet that for $100 million a year, you would apologize for whatever is in your closet and probably things you haven't even done, too. Disclaimer: I watched the video with the sound off and read the transcript and it was... Read more

I agree with GDS's review. Everything else pretty much goes without saying. The guy has game, thats really all that interests me.